“316” Recap and Analysis …
Previously, on Lost: Ben’s been a busy little beaver, bribing, grifting and cajoling all of the Oceanic Six to go back to the island. Sun’s got a little idea of her own, though – an idea that involves popping a cap in Ben’s conniving ass. She has to put her cold dish back on ice, however, when Ben tells her he has to take her to see the magical time lady at the church. Jack tags along, because he hates being left out of ridiculous situations in which he can constantly call everyone crazy for believing the ridiculousness. At Mrs. Hawking’s neighborhood, Desmond shows up at the same time as everyone else and says he’s got some bizness to take care of. So, they get to it, and Mrs. Hawking gets all cryptic and just a bit pompous before the final thonk!
This week, on Lost: It all starts with the opening of an eye – Jack’s eye, to be precise.
Here we go, again.
He’s in the jungle. He stumbles to his feet. We get deja vu. In his hand is a torn piece of paper with the words “I wish” scribbled upon it. Off in the distance, he hears screams for help and, being a man of action, tears ass through the jungle to do what it is that Jack does – I mean, besides bitch at people and get all blowhardy. He rounds into a clearing and we half expect to see a big, hulking wreckage with mass chaos all around. Instead, it’s a cliff with a waterfall, and down below is Hurley, clinging desperately to a guitar case. Jack dives in, wrangles Hurley to the shallow end of the pool and then notices Kate is crumpled up on some rocks by the shore. She appears to be unconscious. It’s time for the swirling LOST…
46 HOURS EARLIER
This week’s drink recipe honors everyone’s favorite murdering bastard, Benjamin Linus. We don’t know yet exactly what went down in his vendetta against the Widmores, but from the look of his face, it ain’t good. Take it easy with this drink, now, cuz it’s a killer. In fact, it’s a …
- 1 ounce gin
- 1/2 ounce Cointreau or similar orange liqueur
- 1/2 ounce apricot brandy (regular brandy will work, too)
- 2 ounces passion-fruit juice (mango will also work in a pinch)
- 2 ounces pineapple juice
Violently sling all the ingredients with ice into a shaker, then beat the hell out of it. Drain the dark and bruised liquid into a champagne flute or a long drink glass with some ice to reduce swelling. Throw a sprig of mint and a cherry into the grave. Offer up a eulogy and toast to life – or death.
Back in LA, Ben has lead Jack, Sun and Desmond into a church to meet with the ever-unsettling Mrs. Eloise Hawkings. Desmond, of course, has been formerly acquainted with the resident time queen, seeing as how she told him back in Season Three that he wouldn’t marry Penny and would end up on an island, pushing a button. Anywho, Eloise leads the quartet down some stairs and into a Dharma station called The Lamp Post. In it is the infamous pendulum we spied at the beginning of the season. It’s really quite large, the pendulum, and there are computers and little flippy tile boards like those down in The Swan, and the map over which the pendulum is swinging is very ornate and appropriately moody. It’s all very impressive, really. After letting all the impressiveness sink in, Eloise starts in with the science and we get to watch Jack’s eyes get all big as his tiny brain is filled with ever-increasing ridiculousness. Basically, the gist of Eloise’s information is thus: the island is unstuck in time and the pendulum exists to not tell where the island is at any given moment, but rather WHEN the island is, and the probability of where it will appear next. Like I said, it’s all very impressive.
All filled up with enough bullshit for one night, Desmond pulls a Jack and tells them all that they’re being used and he’s done with the island. Mrs. Hawking promptly tells him that the island isn’t quite done with him yet – which can only mean that pushing a button down in a hole for three years wasn’t nearly enough, and he must pay the remainder of his pound of flesh at a later date. Desmond storms off.
After Desmond’s tizzy, Eloise hands Jack a binder and points out a specific air flight that will intersect the next predicted coordinate of the island. He must be on that flight – he and all his friends. Eloise then takes Jack into her office and closes the door. Once there, she hands Jack a note – Locke’s suicide note – and informs him that he needs to recreate the original flight of Oceanic 815 as closely as possible in order for this all to work. Amazingly, after five seasons of running from smoke monsters, dealing with hostile, baby-snatching natives and watching Locke’s crazy-ass plans go from incredulous to impossibly true, Jack manages to listen. Eloise informs him that he must give Locke something of Jack’s father’s. Jack starts to be Jack again, what with all the doubting, but Eloise simply tells him “that’s why it’s called a leap of faith,” just as Locke said, long ago, down in that dark Hatch before that first button was pushed. What a long, strange trip, indeed.
Eloise dismisses Jack and he returns upstairs to the church. Ben’s there, and they do a little symbolic song and dance where Ben tells Jack the story of Thomas the Apostle and basically tells Jack that he’s going to have to believe, whether he wants to or not. He then tells Jack that he has to fulfill a promise to an old friend – in other words, he’s off to off Miss Penny Widmore.
Later, in a bar, Jack gets a little ringy dingy from someone at the old folks’ home, informing him that his grandfather has made the Great Escape once again. Jack goes over there and visits with his grandpap Ray, and finds a pair of old shoes in Ray’s suitcase. They’re Christian’s and so Jack asks if he can have them. Ray says of course.
Jack returns to his apartment and finds Kate lying on the bed, trying her best to get back to being that person who was on Oceanic 815 – namely, a manipulative whore. They get it on. Allegedly. He makes her pancakes with little smiley faces in the morning and she plays Ice Queen, and it’s like they have a little slice of the Island right then and there. The phone rings, which is apparently Kate’s Pavlovian response to get the hell out of Dodge, and Jack picks up the phone, alone once again. It’s Ben. Turns out he’s a bit delayed, what with all the killing and maiming he’s been up to, and he needs Jack to pick up Locke’s casket. Locke’s been in a meat locker all this time, staving off rot so’s he won’t be one of those unsightly undead walking around the island.
Man, Long Beach has really gotten rough since the last time I was there. I think we all know what mischief you’ve been up to, Mister Man.
Over at Ben’s butcher, Jack goes into the meat locker and opens the casket. He removes Locke’s shoes and places his father’s shoes on Locke’s feet. Jack smirks and tells Locke that wherever he is, he must be laughing that Jack is actually doing this. For the first time since he taught Kate that little breathing thing for when you’re scared, I actually like Jack. Just for a second, mind you. I half expected him to die right there, as actually liking a despicable character is totally the kiss of death on this show. Alas, he got right back to the land of the living by being his usual dick self when he put the unopened suicide note inside Locke’s jacket and told him “I’ve already heard everything you have to say.” Oh, Jack, please go die in a fire.
We’re at the airport now, and Jack’s trying to use this thing called “charm” to get Locke’s body past the Ajira Airways attendant. He notices Kate’s arrival at the gate, and finally gets cleared to fly, himself. Leaving the line, he is offered condolences by a man that is only credited as “Caesar” in the credits.
Obviously we’re going to see this guy again since he was in Vantage Point last year with our very own Matthew Fox. A far, far better movie than Mr. Fox’s trainwreck Speed Racer.
There are others that have made their way to the airport independently. Sayid pops up, handcuffed and being led past the security line by a woman marshal. Hurley also got the memo, it seems, as he shows up at the Ajira counter and makes sure that the 78 seats he bought on the plane remain his and his alone. Hurley is carrying some essential elements – a comic book and a guitar, presumably one of Charlie’s. They all board and there’s a brief family reunion until Ben gets on board and Hurley starts to lose it. Hurley was informed that Ben was not supposed to come on the trip. Jack assures Hurley that Ben needs to be there and is there to help, which Hurley knows is simply code for lie, cheat, steal and stab when Ben is around.
Hurley makes his way down the aisle with Charlie’s guitar. Looks like there’s quite a few pieces of the old gang on board.
They all take their seats and a flight attendant comes up to Jack to let him know that they found something of his in Locke’s casket. It’s the suicide note. Hah ha, you’re going to have to read it after all, you jackass. Jack grumpily sticks the note in his jacket pocket and the jet is up, up and away.
Once in the air, the captain comes over the intercom and introduces himself as Frank Lapidus. Well, I’ll be dipped in butter. Jack’s brain turns sideways and he finds a stewardess so he can say hello to his old buddy Frank. Frank comes out of the cockpit to say hi and notices all the other Oceanic Six members on board and simply says, “We’re not going to Guam, are we?” I love that guy.
Now back in his seat, Jack engages in a little repartee with Ben. He tells Ben of the suicide note, and Ben leaves him alone so that Jack can read it. Finally, with an air of defeat, Jack pulls the note from his jacket pocket, opens it and begins to read: “Jack, I wish you had believed me. JL.”
We wish so, too, John. We really do.
The plane gives a slight jolt and it seems to be about that time – time to go back. The turbulence picks up and soon the plane is engulfed in a white light and …
… and there’s a closed eye. It opens. It’s Jack. He’s in the jungle. He stumbles to his feet. We get deja vu – again. In his hand is the torn piece of paper from Locke with the words “I wish” the only ones left. Off in the distance, he hears screams for help and, being a man of action, tears ass through the jungle to do what it is that Jack does – try to help people. After the dive into the water to save Hurley, Jack heads over to Kate and revives her. The trio remark that they don’t remember crashing and there’s no wreckage. Jack wants them all to split up and look for survivors. They don’t get very far, as a blue Dharma van comes chugging quickly along the road by the side of the river. A man in a dashing Dharma jumper gets out and levels his gun at them. Jack, Kate and Hurley all stand there, dumbfounded. The camera pans around to reveal that the Dharma security agent is, indeed, Jin. And his mind is just as blown as ours.
Cue the thonk!
I’ve got to hand it to the creative team behind Lost – even though this episode would have been considered a cross between filler and transitional in the old 22+ episode format, they really made this one pack a punch. It not only got the Oceanic Six back to the island, it also introduced a whole slew of new questions that we’ll hopefully see answered over the next season and a half. Also, despite being a transitional episode, we have a lot of ground to cover, so let’s get this party started.
DEM LINES, DEM LINES, DEM … LEY LINES
Well, I’m not usually one to say I told you so, but, dangit … I told you so. I’ve been harping about ley lines – those mysterious connections between key spots along the surface of the Earth – for at least a couple of seasons. In “316,” Mrs. Hawking explains that the Lamp Post – the Dharma Station that houses the probability pendulum – is situated over a unique pocket of electromagnetic energy … a pocket which is connected to other, similar pockets all over the world. The Island rests on top of one of these unique pockets, and it presumably derives its power from it. Since it is connected to the other pockets of power throughout the world, it’s possible to predict both when and where the Island might pop back into our space-time continuum. Basically, in her description of these pockets of energy, Eloise Hawking is all but calling them ley lines, by their classic definition.
I go into much detail about ley lines and how they can relate to the Dharma Initiative and the Island back in the post The Head Case, The Ghostbuster, The Anthropologist and The Drunk. Feel free to go back and read some of that post, if you like, but in order to expedite things and allow me to do a little analysis in the here and now, I’m going to quote my own words. Then we’ll look at a couple of maps and you’ll see what I’m driving at.
“For the uninitiated, ley lines are a metaphysical collection of mapped coordinates that span the globe and intersect at selected intervals. These intersections are often referred to as places of power and mystery. Many believe that the Salisbury Plains of England are positioned above one of those intersections, and it is here that the Druids long ago built Stonehenge. Contemporary scholars and anthropologists have written off Stonehenge as an ancient calendar, but those with a little more imagination have never quite given up the idea that Stonehenge was a place of enigmatic energy that factored into the druids’ arcane rituals. The Great Pyramids of Giza are another such ancient site that supposedly rests upon one of these great ley lines.
“Ley lines were first given their name by an archaeologist by the name of Alfred Watkins in 1921, although their existence had been rumored for centuries. The basis of his theory of these lines was an ancient belief in a geodesic structure of the modern world. Many ancient civilizations often employed mathematically precise straight points between two locations on any created map, with many overlapping intersects. Later, when a full map of the known world began to take shape, the lines were extended on a global scale, with vertices naturally falling upon some of the more famous and regarded locales from the ancient world. Quite a few skeptics of the ley lines concept concede that it’s mostly human nature to plot straight lines between locations, but quite a few admit to the more-than-coincidental placement of many of these so-called ley lines on modern maps.
“For a closer look at the current, broad view of major ley lines, I have created a map based on the Becker-Hagens geodesic distribution maps that are accepted as canon by many ley line enthusiasts. Within each of the distinct geodesic areas, many subpatches of ley convergences can be extrapolated. In other words, the main divides of the earth can be further broken down into other lines that connect to a point, creating minor points of power. I wouldn’t waste too many brain cells trying to figure out this puzzle, as the main grid map will work fairly well for our purposes.”
Here’s the original map I made. On this map, the red dot referenced the spot that Charlotte came across the polar bear collar in the desert. That’s not important, now. What IS important are the numbers and the orange circles. Those circles are where I thought the Island might reside – at least for Seasons One through Four. We’ll revisit this map in a second and look at it in a different light.
“If you’ll refer to our main map, the main vertices are signified by white dots, with secondary vertices marked by squares. The vertices are all coded by number in the main Becker-Hagens map, and I’ve taken the liberty of highlighting our favorite numbers from Lost on the map I created. Whether these might correspond with Dharma locations is anyone’s guess – I doubt highly the Lost writers took a close look at this kind of map before setting up the mythology. However, it’s a fascinating scenario, nonetheless. The circled areas in yellow are three of the locations that many have speculated to be the location of the island. One, of course, corresponds with one of the fabled numbers. For those that might be a bit curious, and even know what I’m talking about, the number four on the map corresponds to the location of the great Tunguska blast of 1908. For the uninitiated, Google it. It’s worth it.”
Okay, now, with the full reintroduction of ley lines out of the way, and a look back at that map, we can now take a look at the map in relation to the probability pendulum at the Lamp Post.
Here, we go. That large intersection of lines made by the pendulum in the center is the spot with the highest probability of Island re-emergence. And now I’ll show you where that spot is on the Becker-Hagens map …
Here I’ve rearranged the map to create a continuous Pacific Ocean. Please forgive the messiness of a couple of intersecting lines. At any rate, the red line on the map corresponds to the main ley line that could match the trajectory of Ajira Airways Flight 316. It dips a bit further south than it should near Australia, but the important part is that the first leg along the ley line takes it straight through vertex number 16 – the vertex, coincidentally, that most readily matches the key spot on the Lamp Post map. Oh, and the main vertex at the end of that line, where it hits North America? That’s right near LA. More than likely the exact spot upon which the Lamp Post was built.
There are two trains of thought we can take in further relation to the ley lines:
1) Might it be possible that the Island is able to spatially displace and reappear somewhere on top of one of these main vertices?
2) The Island only moves through temporal space, much like Mrs. Hawking suggests in this episode, and the Island can only shift spatially very slightly, in accordance to natural fluctuations in the energy vertex upon which it rests.
Right now, neither trains of thought are completely integral to our story, but they’re still fascinating to think about. And, hey, speaking of shifting only in temporal space, let’s move onto the next thing that’s probably bugging the crap out of everyone …
WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED TO THE PLANE?
Surviving the crash of Oceanic 815 was a pretty improbable happenstance, to be sure. Surviving a second crash, unscathed, on board Ajira Airways 316, is bordering on the impossible. Unless, of course, you’ve got time on your side.
It’s logical to infer from Jin’s appearance at the end of the episode in a Dharma suit that Jack, Kate and Hurley have jumped back in time, probably sometime around the early ’80s during Dharma’s heyday. The white flash we saw during the plane’s turbulence was, of course, a time shift over the temporal vertex during the Island’s reemergence. Since the Oceanic Six are intimately entwined with the Island, they essentially jaunted down the same “leapline” as Jin, Sawyer, Juliet, Miles and Daniel. They all remarked, however, that they don’t remember crashing and that there was no sign of wreckage.
There are a couple of ways this all can go down. First, the plane actually did crash on the island, but we just haven’t seen the wreckage yet. For this to have happened, we would have to remember the “upside down house” rule I mentioned last week, where the plane would jump with the Oceanic Six because of their proximity. It’s also possible that only part of the plane actually jumped with the six, leaving the back half of the plane back in the “current” timeline. This means, of course, that it still crashed. The other way we can think of this is if the Oceanic Six, along with Ben, Frank Lapidus, the female marshal and Caesar were the only ones on the plane to timejump, leaving the plane intact back in the current timeline with no pilot, but a co-pilot that could take over. That would mean the plane actually didn’t crash and only the people I mentioned left behind on the island.
Of course, we still have that damn water bottle in the mix. You know, this one:
Unless that belongs to Hurley or one of the other main characters, that means that the plane went down sometime in the island’s history, and there are other survivors out there. When Sawyer, Juliet, etc. timejumped and came across the boat on the beach, they were also chased, presumably by the survivors of that Ajira Airways flight.
So, to summarize, I think the flight did go down, but it may have gone down in a different time than Jack and the others. Who knows, they could become the next set of survivors to make their way on the island, much like the Oceanic gang did, starting the time cycle anew.
As for how Jack, Hurley and Kate managed to survive a crash or a fall or whatever from that height, it either has to be some Island magic, or it has to do with the Earth being in a different spatial position when the six, or the plane, came out of its timejump. You may remember my reference to things shifting spatially because they reemerge in a spot in the Earth’s history when it isn’t exactly in the same spot from which it left. I talked about it a bit back in the review for The Little Prince. Check it out, it’ll explain how someone who is a mile up can find themselves suddenly a mile down when they pop out of the temporal continuum 20-some odd years in the past.
WORKING FOR THE MAN
You remember this mind-blowing moment, right?
From the looks of things at the end of this episode, Jin is in the employ of Dharma. Now, it’s possible that Jin could have stolen that jumpsuit, rifle and Dharma buggy, but it’s far more likely that he, Daniel, and the gang may be stuck back in the early ’80s, and they’ve infiltrated Dharma. It would certainly explain why Daniel is bebopping around down in the basement of the Orchid in the season premiere.
I believe that what might have happened when Locke turned the Great Wheel is that Daniel and Co. jumped to the early ’80s. After he unstuck the Wheel and created a flash, it may have locked all of them into that particular time period. After awhile, when it seemed as though they weren’t jumping any longer, they needed to infiltrate Dharma and see if they could access the Great Wheel once again, so that it might be possible to get back to their own time. Of course, they could all still be jumping and they set a plan in motion to infiltrate Dharma and get access to the wheel so that they could try and stop the Island from skipping. It’s really too early to tell, but it’s going to be an awesome set of developments now that the rest of the Oceanic Six are back.
As for what station Jin is working at, it’s hard to say. The Dharma logo on his jumpsuit doesn’t really correspond to any existing logo that we’ve come across so far in the show. Here, take a look:
The most likely station would be that of the Arrow, since he’s driving around, looking for disturbances and keeping the peace. Of course, in the season premiere, Marvin Candle is just making the orientation film for the Arrow (a lot of you needed to straighten me out, apparently, when I mistakenly mentioned it was for the Swan – well, he was wearing a smock with the Swan logo!), so it might not have existed in its full form just yet. There were probably some initial stations built by Dharma before they became aware of the “hostiles,” and before the “incident” occurred that turned the Swan from a research and science headquarters into the containment confines for the button. It looks very likely that the Dharma logo on Jin’s jumpsuit is a five-cornered star, sort of like what a sheriff or deputy would wear. Maybe it was a security station that was a precursor to the full-time security station of the Arrow. I guess we’ll have to wait and see.
I will say, however, that the people behind the show just love to screw around with us detail hunters. They purposefully turned down Jin’s collar to hide his full Dharma logo. Punks.
Oh, I almost forgot. You regular readers probably know that I really don’t spend a ton of time looking around online for Lost tidbits, but I did happen across something interesting. Someone had a selected recording from the episode “The Little Prince,” specifically of the moment that Rousseau’s French team is picking up a radio broadcast of the number sequence. Well, if you haven’t seen this or heard this already, it’s a dead ringer for Hurley’s voice. I’m embarrassed to say that I totally missed that. Now that Hurley’s back on the island and they happen to have timejumped right into the Dharma Initiative time, it would make total sense that the number sequence could have been put together by Hurley. That’s another example of a timeloop paradox, but we won’t go back into those right now.
Was it Hurley’s voice on the recording the French team heard? Audio courtesy of sl-Lost.com.
One other huge question that’s itching my brain from this episode is what the hell was Ben up to back in LA? The obvious answer is living up to his promise to Charles Widmore by killing Charles’s daughter, Penny. That’s a horrible line of thought to even follow, but it makes the most sense. Does Ben succeed? What’s happened to her, Desmond or even little Charlie?
Mrs. Hawking told Desmond that the Island was not finished with him yet, so he will likely make his way back to the Island before too long. Obviously, he wasn’t on the plane, so he’ll need to get back there some other way. He’ll also need a motive. I’m truly hoping that motive isn’t revenge, but it’s one possible reason. Desmond could have come around too late to save Penny from Ben, and he beat him to a bloody pulp before Ben dove off Desmond’s boat and into the water. If that’s the case, Desmond may be returning to the island for vengeance.
If Ben does get to Penny, the other reason that Desmond may return to the island is so that he can put things right. Daniel told Desmond that he’s a bit special, and the normal rules of time travel and temporal theory don’t seem to apply to him. Desmond may be able to change something in the past and create a different outcome where he saves Penny.
Of course, Ben could have tried to get to Penny, Desmond showed up in time, beat the ever-loving crap out of him, tossed him off the boat and sailed off on his merry way. In that case, the only reason we may see Desmond again is if Daniel asks for Desmond’s help yet again. That may convince Desmond that he can’t ignore the pleas.
STOP THE WORLD, THERE ARE TOO MANY QUESTIONS
Here’s a collection of some of my random thoughts, and answers to some questions that were brought up by my friend Sandy, and by Mr. Joel Murphy, of Hobotrashcan.com fame.
Why do you think Sayid is in custody?
I don’t know for sure, but if I were a betting man, I’d put down odds that Ben had something to do with it.
How do you think Hurley got released?
With a little help from his friends, of course. Namely Charlie, Ana Lucia, Libby …
How did Hurley find out about the flight? And has he known for a long time? It seems unlikely that he would be able to buy 78 tickets at the last minute, so could he have known before the rest of the Oceanic Six? (Or will having him secure all of those tickets at the last minute be something that the writers expect us not to question?) I guess the most logical answer would be Widmore told Hurley – or perhaps he sent Matthew Abaddon to talk to Hurley on his behalf.
Like I said above, he probably learned about all this from Charlie or Libby. He can see dead people, and they always have something interesting to say. As for the tickets – creative liberty, I would guess. It’s not very realistic, but they sometimes make crazy things happen just for Hurley.
What do you think happened to Kate and Aaron?
I’m pretty sure Aaron is back with Carole Littleton – his grandmother. At least for the time being.
How does whatever happened to Aaron play in to the psychic’s prediction that only Claire could raise him and Claire’s plea to Kate not to bring Aaron back to the island?
That’s an excellent question … one in which I will put some thought into once I go back and watch “Raised by Another” from Season One.
Do you think Jack got Kate pregnant on their last night away from the Island?
Yeppers, I do. It’d only be fitting. I’ll withhold any crazy theories I might have about their child growing up in another time and eventually becoming Jacob. Oh, crap, I just said it. Oh well.
Can you believe Sun deserted her daughter?
Yes, because she has hope that she can bring Jin back home. It’s a hard choice to make, but she had to make it for her family.
Why do you think Locke killed himself?
I don’t really know, but I’m guessing we find out next week!
Who was the shady guy on the flight that talked to Jack in line? Did he make it to the island?
For right now, all I know is that his name is Caesar. You can bet, though, that he’ll be back and he’s probably jumping with the Oceanic survivors since Daniel and Co. are, as well. I’m willing to be that he’s been on the Island before, too.
Do you think Christian will get his shoes back?
Haha … yes, he might just.
Speaking of Christian, it will be interesting to see how next week’s episode pans out with Locke. From the previews, it appears as though Locke is resurrected once he’s on the Island. I figure most of you assumed that would happen. What I want to know, though, is if he will exist in a sort of semi-phase state as Christian appears to. If you’ll notice, Christian only interacts with his environment in a very limited way, and when Locke asks for help in the Great Wheel chamber, he can’t offer any. Is this because Christian is somehow “out of phase” with the normal spatial and temporal continuum? Will John be completely healed and restored to life as he was before he left the island, or will he exist as Christian does? This will be interesting to see.
That about wraps it up for this week. I covered a lot, but there’s still more thoughts a-bubbling. If any of you have some epiphanies, please let me know. For now, I will simply leave you with this:
You remember Adam and Eve from Season One, right? Well, it’s a pretty safe bet now that they’re a couple of the people we’ve grown to know and love. They’re the first evidence of time travel within the show, and it’s all going to come full circle before we reach the end …
Chris Kirkman is a graphic designer/photographer/journalist/geek extraordinaire with way too many Bruce Campbell movies in his library. He is still hoping that Lost will end when Bob Newhart wakes up next to Suzanne Pleshette, complaining of a strange, strange dream. You can contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org.