I’m very pleased to be back on Hobo Trashcan, complete with my spiffy new cartoon version of myself! I think it looks pretty good. I like being immortalized like that! But, enough about my penchant for feeling like a work of art. On with the first reader interaction edition of The Real Camille. The question I picked for my first response might strike you as odd, but hear me out because I have a point.
Any unconventional/unique Valentine’s Day ideas?
That’s an excellent question, JM! Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to get to this question by Valentine’s Day, so I hope you figured something out, but there is method to my madness when it comes to the fact that I’ve chosen to answer this question anyways. The thing is, I do really like the idea of Valentine’s Day in a lot of ways. I think that it’s great that we have a day to serve as a reminder for what we should ultimately be doing a lot more frequently for the loved ones in our lives.
Valentine’s Day can be wonderfully romantic, but it feels forced if it’s the only time of the year where you actually do anything out of the ordinary. I’m not saying that every day needs to be an elaborate series of activities solely to woo the one you’re with, but I am a
firm believer in doing something a little special at least a few times a month. It’s important to strike a balance between too much and not enough, because you don’t want to go overboard and make romance seem monotonous. You can only go so far.
My unconventional/unique idea is that romance isn’t one size fits all, so the most romantic thing you can do is to know what your partner would like, and understand that this evolves. Some people like the element of surprise, so little thoughtful gifts or acts (which needn’t
cost much/any money) are the way to go. Some people like creativity, so things like scavenger hunts, artistic attempts (even if they aren’t incredibly skilled) or anything that forces you to break the mold of your relationship will really bring them joy.
Others find romance in the mundane, like ordering in and watching a bad movie or getting an extra-long back rub. This doesn’t mean that they won’t also want to be treated specially occasionally (and Valentine’s day is a nice excuse to spiff up and go out somewhere
nice) but for more frequent attention, just the basics will make them quite happy. Then again, there are those who like to be treated like a princess all the time. Even this shouldn’t break the bank. Occasional presents, sure, but playing the stereotypical romeo with
candles, a little wine and some seduction does the trick for the most part.
A lot of this comes back to the idea of what ways people like to show and receive love. Some people like words, some like actions, some like gifts, some like physical or sexual intimacy. It’s all about knowing what they want in that respect and knowing what kind of people they are in general. But really, it never hurts to try the cheesy romantic route once in a while. Flowers, a poem, a carefully planned date. Even though one size fits all isn’t the approach to go with most of the time, it’s an archetype in our society which is often engrained in some small way. Once in a blue moon it’s nice to just acknowledge that and roll with it.
Hopefully this is a sufficiently unique way to approach romance, and I’m sure that when all parters are engaged in critical thinking about what the other truly wants and make a genuine concerted effort to add romance to their lives, Valentine’s day will just be a day like any
other, only with more chocolate.
You can follow Camille Crimson on Twitter @camillecrimson or check out her (NSFW) site at CamilleCrimson.com.