As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a “please” and “thank you,” hold the door for the person coming behind me, give credit where credit is due kind of guy. Even when said credit is deserved by an individual or group that I usually don’t agree with. Or even like.
So I hope that you’re siting down because the words that I am about to write are making me a little light headed; I can imagine how those of you that tune in to my weekly media bashing sessions are going to feel about them, but here goes …
Thank you, CNN.com.
I’ve complained in this column in the past about mainstream media liberal bias more than once, but this week, CNN.com not only posted some incredibly balanced content, but also introduced me to my new man-crush.
Don’t get me wrong, I still believe 100 quajillion percent that most media outlets slant hard left and present a skewed view of the world designed to make certain demographics feel guilty and evil for being born a certain a color, with certain genitals and a certain sexual identity. But the same can be said for the right-slanting media outlets. Especially that one network that seems to have been operating for the last 20 years under the premise that “H.R.” stands for Harem Recruitment for its former biggest male star and former Chairman/CEO.
Though I don’t rail on them much here, I have a lot of issues with the right, too. So in the spirit of balance inspired by CNN, it’s only fair that I list my top five:
1. What happens sexually between two or more consenting adults in the privacy of their own bedroom, living room or red room of pain is none of your fucking business. Pun fully intended.
2. Same sex marriage does not devalue heterosexual marriage – a 1/3 to 1/2 divorce rate and the number of accounts registered at ashleymadison.com do though.
3. The “Why don’t we outlaw cars? They kill more people than guns” argument is the stupidest ever. Cars were designed for transportation, associated deaths are an unfortunate by-product of millions of people commuting daily at highway speeds in 3000 pound piles of metal and glass to maintain an economy. Guns have no other purpose than to kill.
4. The bathroom bill was a bad law because it was unenforcible without violating EVERYONE’S rights.
5. Until scientists can come up with definitive proof that abortions are murder, how about we practice what we preach and let God do the judging and punishing. Again, pun fully intended.
But I digress. CNN.com not only posted this amazing piece on the beating that the first amendment is taking in some colleges and how those specific institutions are creating generations of weak, coddled, entitled whiners, but they also introduced me to this brilliant, handsome gentleman …
CNN legal analyst, and my new man-crush, Danny Cevallos, pictured above with Philadelphia as his backdrop. (Brotherly love, indeed.)
My introduction to Cevallos came through this post about hate crime laws and their application. When I saw the title of the article I was prepared to be annoyed. But much to my surprise, I agreed with literally every point that the author made.
I have NEVER agreed with an entire article on CNN.com before, so imagine my surprise when it happened again, a few days later with this post on the latest customer vs. airline employee viral video, one of many that I read while researching the post that I was going to write for this week entitled, “The Not So Friendly Skies.”
I checked the by-line and sure enough, it was Danny Cevallos again.
According to his bio:
Danny Cevallos is a CNN legal analyst and co-founder of the law firm Cevallos & Wong, LLP. He focuses his practice in the areas of state, federal and territorial criminal defense and civil litigation. Cevallos practices primarily in Pennsylvania and the U.S. Virgin Islands. He is also admitted to practice in New York, New Jersey, the District Court of Puerto Rico and the United States Supreme Court.
Cevallos hosted the former In Session on CourtTV and TruTV. He is also a regular on HLN shows Nancy Grace, Dr. Drew On Call and HLN Now. Cevallos is also a columnist for CNN.com, CNN Opinion and CNN Digital, and his column appears regularly on the opinion page and in CNN Digital productions.
Cevallos received his Bachelor of Arts degree in English Literature in 1997 from the University of Michigan atAnn Arbor. He earned his Juris Doctorate degree from The University of Notre Dame School of Law in 2000. He is a member of the Pennsylvania Association of Criminal Defense Attorneys, and the National Association of Criminal Defense Attorneys. Mr. Cevallos is an adjunct professor of such courses as Health Care Law and Health Care Ethics at Drexel University’s College of Nursing and Health Professions in Philadelphia, teaching up to three courses every term since 2007.
My new man-crush lives only two hours away from me and has even been featured on one of local FOX affiliates …
… so after writing his name, like, a million times on my notebook, I wrote this column.
Thanks CNN.com for actually being (unlike others) fair and balanced lately.
And for bringing Danny into my life.
Tony Marion is a writer and filmmaker who splits time between Lancaster, PA and Baltimore, MD. He lives for the work of Descendents (the band), Chuck Palahniuk and Rian Johnson. Check out the digital embodiment of procrastination he calls his website here.