A Cinecle View – Live/Not Live: Super Bowl LII

Tony Marion

Tony Marion

In honor of the one organized sports team to which I have always remained faithful, the Philadelphia Eagles of the National Football League, I’ve decided to do something different with this week’s A Cinecle View.

I call it, Live/Not Live.

Essentially, it’s as close as I’ll ever come to live blogging because, well, I have a crippling fear of anything that even rhymes with social media, and a pathological need to rewrite up until deadline. And sometimes, for two to nine days past deadline. Sorry, Joel.

But what you’re about to read is a timestamped, blow by blow account of how I perceived Super Bowl LII as it happened.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 4:27 pm

I started writing a column about watching the Super Bowl and took a picture to prove it.

CINECLE SUPERBOWL FIRST PIC

See!

Scintillating, right? This is going to be fun!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 4:41 pm

I’m already bored with pregame analysis and hype. Let’s change the channel for a bit.

KITTEN BOWL

I wonder if the New York Giants or Cleveland Browns are watching this and wondering if they can pick up any of these players in the off season. Couldn’t hurt.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 5:14 pm

For @#%&$ sake, why does the game have to start so late? How can I make the wait less boring?

CAPTAIN

Consider me timbers shivered.

1ST FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 5:48 pm

I just put on the same jammy pants, thermal shirt and hat that I was wearing during the NFC Divisional Playoffs and NFC Championship Game.

LUCKY HAT

World class athletes trained in state of the art facilities by the best physical fitness experts that money can buy, executing strategies concocted by some of the greatest minds in professional sports are no substitute for a freelance filmmaker/writer and his magic hat.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 5:55 pm

On the Pregame Show, legendary coach/broadcaster Tony Dungy and Baltimore Ravens Head Coach John Harbaugh just picks the Eagles to win the game. I don’t know whether to feel bad for rooting for EVERY team the Ravens played this year or be pissed that these endorsements probably just negated the magical powers of my hat and cursed the Eagles. I’m so freaked now. If only there was something that could calm me down.

1ST EMPTY

Thanks, Harbaugh.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:20pm

I’ll give Pink $5 if she medley’s the National Anthem into U + U.R. Hand.

PINK

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:28pm

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom looks BAD ASS!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:31pm

Oh yeah, there’s a football game and they just kicked off! I’ll drink to that.

2ND FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:28pm

A long Eagles drive ends with a field goal: Eagles 3, Patriots 0. SALUD!

2ND EMPTY

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:44pm

Afraid to get my hopes up for any part of this, but Donald Glover looks amazing as Lando.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:52pm

The Patriots answer back with a field goal of their own. Eagles 3,
Patriots 3. This is entirely too nerve wracking.

3RD FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:58pm

Foles to Jeffery TOUCHDOWN!

Eagles 9, Patriots 3. Cheers to that!

3RD EMPTY

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 6:58pm

The Patriots kicker just missed a field goal!

1ST FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 7:17pm

No Super Bowl is complete without ridiculous food.

FOOD

Homemade Buffalo Chicken Meatball Wraps and Hand Cut Dizzy Pig Red Eye Express Fries! Nom nom nom …

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 7:21pm

Cool, J.J bought another movie and slapped a “Cloverfield” sticker on it … and sent it to Netflix.

But it’s got Elizabeth Debicki so …

1ST EMPTY

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 7:31pm

21 yard TOUCHDOWN run by FORMER Patriot, LeGarrette Blount

Eagles 15, Patriots 3

This calls for a celebration!

2ND FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 7:38pm

The Patriots kicked another field goal. Epic comeback starts right here?

2ND EMPTY

Eagles 15, Patriots 6

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 7:43pm

An Eagles receiver just deflected the ball into the hands of a Patriot defender!

3RD FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 7:51pm

Touchdown Patriots …

3RD EMPTY

Eagles 15, Patriots 12

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 8:03pm

WHAT THE EVER-LOVING @#&#?

Eagles 22, Patriots 12

10TH FULL

Hell to the yeah!

10TH EMPTY

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 8:33pm

I wonder if at some point during the run of this show, Jack Ryan will defeat a villain by getting ahold of his stationary and FAXing him fake notes from his future self?

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 8:46pm

Ugh, here we go …

8TH FULL

Touchdown Patriots.

8TH EMPTY

Eagles 22, Patriots 19

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:00pm

I feel like there’s something on my TV, but I don’t see anything …

I’ll tee one up for that …

9TH FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:02pm

… and slam it down for this!

9TH EMPTY

Eagles 29, Patriots 19

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:03pm

Yikes!

How could they have been doing this better 12 years ago?

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:11pm

Touchdown Patriots.

10TH FULL

10TH EMPTY

11TH FULL

Eagles 29, Patriots 26

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:21pm

Best … Super Bowl … Commercial … EVER!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:25pm

Field goal Eagles. I have a bad feeling about this …

Eagles 32, Patriots 26

11Th EMPTY

12TH FULL

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:35pm

… and this would be why.

Eagles 32, Patriots 33

12TH EMPTY

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 9:59pm

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?

Where did all the rum go?

Eagles 38, Patriots 33

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 10:05pm

Patriots are driving, only down by 5, and I’m out of rum. I don’t think that I can anymore.

No, wait, I TOTALLY CAN!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 10:09pm

Field goal.

Eagles 41, Patriots 33

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018, 10:13pm

I spoke to soon. The Eagles failed to run out the clock and now the man with more Super Bowl rings than any other, the man with more come from behind victories in the post season than any other, is one score away from tying the game and forcing over time.

THE EAGLES WIN! THE EAGLES WIN! THE EAGLES WIN! I’m out of rum. BUT THE EAGLES WIN!

Tony Marion is a writer and filmmaker who splits time between Lancaster, PA and Baltimore, MD. He lives for the work of Descendents (the band), Chuck Palahniuk and Rian Johnson. Check out the digital embodiment of procrastination he calls his website here.

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