Hobo Stu

Hello everyone,

It’s been a busy week here on HoboTrashcan. In case you missed the announcement, to celebrate the site’s five-year anniversary, we brought back five defunct site features.

Personally, it’s been a lot of fun to stroll down memory lane and to revisit with these great former contributors. I can’t help but feel a little misty eyed when thinking about it now, but that may be because Ned Bitters got pepper sprayed at the Hobo Headquarters office party and, since I was next to him, a little bit of it ended up in my eyes as well.

I hope you all have been enjoy the festivities as much as we have. If there were features that you really enjoyed seeing again (or ones you thought were missing), please let us know.

Also, make sure to check out our newest feature, Joel and Lars’ Box Office Preview.

Happy anniversary, everyone. Thanks for five great years.

Here’s what’s new on HoboTrashcan.com this week:

Chicken and Milk
Jeremiah Wentz’s unique photo comic, which originally ran on the site from November 2007 to September 2008, returns with two brand new installments this week.

Just Friends – Nicole 2010
Our editor-in-chief Joel Murphy has a lot of hot women resting comfortably inside his “friend zone.” When HoboTrashcan first began, we showcased those friends. This week, the feature returns with the lovely Nicole.

Note to Self – Why your team won’t win the Super Bowl 2010
With preseason officially underway, football fans across this great nation are convincing themselves that this could be their team’s year. Brian Murphy returns to the site to explain why they’re wrong.

Overrated – Local pride
Before Aaron R. Davis moved in as HoboTrashcan’s resident curmudgeon, there was Ned Bitters. Bitters returns to the site this week to take local pride down a peg.

Tales from the Road
In the early days of the site, we would post a monthly outdoor photo in a segment called Tales from the Road. This week, professional photographer Neil Greenberg helps bring that segment back.

Box Office Preview – August 27, 2010
Trying to decide what movie to see this weekend? In an all new feature, Joel Murphy and Lars breakdown the five new films hitting theaters today and recommend the one that they believe is the safest bet.

Murphy’s Law – Things that piss me off 2010
What do Sonic, Jimmy Fallon, Channing Tatum, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia and that ridiculous Nissan Cube have in common? They all piss off Joel Murphy.

Outside of the In-Crowd – Spencer Pratt, you magnificent bastard
Most people assume Spencer Pratt is a worthless douchebag, but could he actually be an evil genius? Courtney Enlow investigates in this week’s column.

Positive Cynicism – I’m not dumb enough to enjoy Family Guy
When he bashed The Family Guy, one counterargument Aaron R. Davis didn’t expect to hear was that he was too intelligent to enjoy the show’s humor. Davis responds to this “personal attack” this week.

Hobo Radio 146 – Ben Stiller is getting Ratnered
When you think of great actor/director combos in Hollywood today, you might think of Johnny Depp and Tim Burton, Leonardo DiCaprio and Martin Scorsese or Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg. But a new actor/director powerhouse has been formed and Hollywood may never be the same – Brett Ratner and Ben Stiller.

- Hobo Stu

Hobo Stu’s Weekly Recap is also available as an email newsletter. To sign up for the newsletter to ensure you never miss an update, send an email to newsletter-subscribe@hobotrashcan.com.

Hobo Stu

Hello everyone,

Monday is HoboTrashcan’s five-year anniversary.

I’ve been sworn to secrecy about what exactly is in store for all of you this coming week, but I think you all are really going to enjoy it. So make sure to stay tuned to the site for a few surprises.

Here’s what’s new on HoboTrashcan.com this week:

Murphy’s Law – Scott Pilgrim vs. The Expendables
The Expendables may have won the battle at the box office, but is it a better film than Scott Pilgrim vs. The World? Joel Murphy has seen both films and he believes that even if you are looking for nothing more than a fun action movie, Scott Pilgrim is still the better choice.

Outside of the In-Crowd – Charlie Sheen might be the devil
This week, Courtney Enlow takes a look back at Charlie Sheen’s extensive list of transgressions, starting with his tumultuous relationship with Kelly Preston back in 1990. She then openly wonders why Sheen continues to be rewarded for his behavior and why people continue to watch his unfunny television show.

Positive Cynicism – Your complaints are hollow, Star Wars fans
Star Wars fans love complaining about George Lucas almost as much as they love the franchise itself. The constant tinkering and retooling of the original three films, the lackluster new trilogy and the constant barrage of merchandise are all sore subjects for fans of the series. This week, Aaron R. Davis attacks these fans for their constant complaining.

Hobo Radio 145 – Lars finally peaks
It’s not easy being Lars. For years, he has toiled away in mediocrity, overlooked and ignored by the world at large. When glancing at his pasty skin and boney arms, people typically don’t expect much from him. But this past week, like Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting, Lars saw an opportunity for greatness and he seized it. This week, he recounts that glorious moment.

From the Vault – One on One with Lisa Lackey
In a world of superheroes, it’s tough to be an average citizen stuck at home caring for your superbaby, especially when your mind reading husband is still harboring resentment over the fact that you slept with his partner. All that aside, Janice Parkman does her best to keep her chin up and roll with the punches.

Playing Mrs. Parkman on Heroes is Australian actor Lisa Lackey, who sat down with us last year to talk about working on Heroes, accidentally serenading David Lynch and how being Australian is nothing like what you’ve seen on TV. If you missed it then, enjoy it now.

- Hobo Stu

Hobo Stu’s Weekly Recap is also available as an email newsletter. To sign up for the newsletter to ensure you never miss an update, send an email to newsletter-subscribe@hobotrashcan.com.

Hobo Stu

Hello everyone,

I hope you all have something fun planned for this Friday the 13th.

I’m hanging out with my friend Jason. Apparently he wants to play hockey with me, since he just arrived here in a goalie mask. Not sure why he brought the machete though. I guess he couldn’t find a hockey stick.

Here’s what’s new on HoboTrashcan.com this week:

Murphy’s Law – Oh boy, a Bakula-less Quantum Leap
For a Quantum Leap fan like Joel Murphy, the news that they are adapting the franchise into a movie was incredibly exciting … until he found out that, according to the powers that be, Scott Bakula is now too old to reprise his role as Dr. Sam Beckett. This week, Murphy argues that they should reconsider, since Bakula was the heart and soul of the show.

Outside of the In-Crowd – Regretful Adoration Theater: Grease 2
Courtney Enlow is on a mission to go back and revisit movies from her childhood that she at one time loved unconditionally. Some of these movies she continues to enjoy as guilty pleasures, others she now regrets ever having been smitten by. The final movie up for review in “Regretful Adoration Theater” is Grease 2.

Positive Cynicism – An entire movie studio dedicated to flaccidity
When last we heard from Aaron R. Davis’ friend Harlan, he was arguing that all of Steven Spielberg’s movies are really about “conquering or mastering the penis.” This week, Harlan returns with his theory that all of Pixar’s films are truly about sexual inadequacy. Harlan explains his theory while Davis provides a voice of reason in this week’s column.

Hobo Radio 144 – This cookie tastes funny
A research team in Tokyo has created a way to change the taste of a cookie using virtual reality technology. While trying to discover a practical use for such an invention, Joel Murphy and Lars inadvertently stumble upon the greatest prank of all time. It’s an incredibly juvenile and unpleasant prank, but one they just can’t stop laughing about.

- Hobo Stu

Hobo Stu’s Weekly Recap is also available as an email newsletter. To sign up for the newsletter to ensure you never miss an update, send an email to newsletter-subscribe@hobotrashcan.com.

Hobo Stu

Hello everyone,

Here’s what’s new on HoboTrashcan.com this week:

One on One with Lauren Stamile
It’s not easy being a home wrecker. Luckily, Lauren Stamile, who has been the wedge between McDreamy and Meredith on Grey’s Anatomy and Jeff and Britta on Community, is so charming and lovable that it’s impossible to stay mad at her for keeping these great television couples apart. We recently talked to Stamile about the medical accuracy of Grey’s Anatomy, the philosophical underpinnings of Community’s finale and the fact that, deep down, she is really an 88-year-old grandmother.

Murphy’s Law – Thinking inside the box
At this week’s press tour, the creator of the new Fox show Lone Star said that comparing your show to Mad Men or Breaking Bad during a network pitch meeting is typically the kiss of death since networks view these shows as low-rated, inferior cable programming. Joel Murphy believes this is what’s wrong with network television these days.

Outside of the In-Crowd – Live every week like it’s Shark Week
Most of the time, when people think of sharks, they think of a Jaws-like scenario where swimmers are being devoured left and right. But once a year, there is a magical time known as “Shark Week,” where we pay tribute to these majestic beasts in a series of TV specials. This week, Courtney Enlow honors Shark Week.

Positive Cynicism – Triceratops (not triceratops)
This past weekend, news broke that John Scanella and Jack Horner, two of the world’s preeminent paleontologists, now claim that the triceratops isn’t a unique species of dinosaur, but is instead a juvenile form of the lesser-known torosaurus. Internet communities are very upset about this latest development, but Aaron R. Davis urges them to chill out in this week’s column.

Hobo Radio 143 – A little less conversation, a little more action
Lawrence Fishburne may be upset right now that his attractive 18-year-old daughter has decided to release a sex tape, but Montana Fishburne is confident that eventually her father “will view it as a positive.” Joel Murphy and Lars, two fans of the actor, do their best to put a positive spin on this for Fishburne this week.

From the Vault – One on One with Jonah Hill
All it took was one small scene in The 40 Year Old Virgin to become a fan of Jonah Hill for life. What’s not to love about a guy who wants nothing more than to be able to buy a pair of hooker boots with goldfish in them? If it really is about the simpler things in life than Jonah’s got it made.

Of course, since that moment when he stole our hearts, Hill has gone on to star in comedy hits like Superbad, Funny People and, most recently, Get Him to the Greek. In 2006, Hill kicked off his boots and sat down with us to talk about life as a writer-turned-actor. If you missed it then, enjoy it now.

- Hobo Stu

Hobo Stu’s Weekly Recap is also available as an email newsletter. To sign up for the newsletter to ensure you never miss an update, send an email to newsletter-subscribe@hobotrashcan.com.

Hobo Stu

Hello everyone,

I know it’s only July, but I figured out what I’m asking for for Christmas – an army of gun-toting monkey soldiers.

Hopefully I can be a good boy the rest of the year.

Here’s what’s new on HoboTrashcan.com this week:

Murphy’s Law – When animals attack
A Chinese newspaper recently reported that the Taliban trained an army of monkeys to fire automatic weapons at U.S. troops. Luckily, scientists have since debunked this myth, but Joel Murphy still thinks that animals may be useful on the battlefield, which is why he recommends we train Colorado black bears to drive our humvees.

Outside of the In-Crowd – A house full of lies
Most Full House fans grew up thinking that the Tanners were a perfect television family governed by wholesome values and a healthy appreciation for the importance of cleanliness. However, beneath the surface, the Tanners were much more troubled than we ever realized. This week, Courtney Enlow shows us who these characters really were.

Positive Cynicism – Another journey through the hate mail
Some writers like to take time out of their busy schedules to answer the pleasant messages that pour in from their adoring fans. Aaron R. Davis, on the other hand, prefers to respond to the hate mail he receives. This week, he opens up the big ol’ bag of hate and responds to each insult and personal attack.

Hobo Radio 142 – Oliver Stone sucks at life
Oliver Stone, who is working on a film that will supposedly allow viewers to “walk in Stalin’s shoes and Hitler’s shoes to understand their point of view,” recently claimed that Hitler is an “easy scapegoat,” Stalin was essentially a hero and the reason these facts are distorted is because of the “Jewish domination of the media.” It’s tough to find a silver lining in these hateful comments, but Joel Murphy and Lars have found one – it’s now okay to openly hate Oliver Stone. After years of hating his movies only to have people try to convince them Stone is a misunderstood genius, Joel and Lars will sleep better at night knowing that the pompous director is a terrible person who should be disliked.

- Hobo Stu

Hobo Stu’s Weekly Recap is also available as an email newsletter. To sign up for the newsletter to ensure you never miss an update, send an email to newsletter-subscribe@hobotrashcan.com.