In your book, you mention that you end up becoming the safe male friend with a lot of the Divas.
(Laughs.) I think I said if it wasn't for my super-de-duper heterosexual lifestyle and four – count them one, two, three, four children – I might be considered the gay friend. I'm flattered by that because it's not such a bad thing to have the WWE Divas feeling comfortable around you because they are pretty sure they're not going to be hit on.
How tempted are you to break out your Diva speed dial to impress?
(Laughs.) It's funny because you can justify so many things in life, whether it be eating boxes of Girl Scout cookies in one sitting because it goes to a good cause or whipping out the Divas on speed dial when I'm at a camp for kids who have faced some pretty serious challenges. So, if I can make kids smile and show off at the same time, then by God, I'm going to do it. And the girls understand that completely. I've only got two on the speed dial, but they understand that's part of the deal, that they will be called on to make children smile.
Your book talks a lot about Promoland, the place in your mind where you go to compose promos. When you are away from wrestling, how much time do you spend in Promoland thinking about imaginary promos that you might never actually deliver?
Not that much. That's where the novels have really come in handy. And granted, people chose not to read the novels, but they were a great way of putting a vision down on paper. I guess the frustrating thing with novels is that you basically have an idea, sit on it for a year, then spend hundreds of hours working on it, then two and a half years later, a limited number of people read that vision. Whereas, in WWE, I can have an idea barreling down the highway at 3 a.m. and it's seen by millions the next day. So, given the choice, I'd rather do it the WWE way. But I do feel like I have other outlets for creativity.
You've previously mentioned plans to write a novel about a black woman in her 30s growing up in the segregated south in the mid-1950s. Are you still planning on writing that novel?
I am, but I'm going to be fairly low key about it because I may actually write that under an assumed name, thereby escape the harshest of the critics, who are just out to cut a wrestler down to size. And then, if by some lucky break the thing turns out to be a success, I'll be taking credit for it the next day.
Who makes a better literary punching bag – Al Snow or Test?
I really enjoyed inflicting little bits of damage on Test in this one because, unlike Al, Test takes himself quite seriously. So these would be kind of like stinging jabs, but none of them would actually be literary knock-out blows. But you have to keep in mind that I wouldn't waste my time making fun of somebody if I didn't like the guy. I do like Test, but I just think it's funny that he's the butt of so many jokes in the book.
Where do you stand on bringing in celebrities like Donald Trump or Kevin Federline as a way to garner more attention? Is it a good thing to have people like that hanging around the WWE?
I'm all for it. I think at a certain point, WWE and WCW may have overdone it. But I think a couple of good celebrity storylines a year can be very beneficial. I think this thing with Trump is getting a lot of attention for the WWE. My feeling is that once people sample our wares, they'll stay a while. And hey, if Donald Trump can bring people to the WWE plate, then it's beneficial to everybody.
And Federline, shockingly enough, was apparently a pretty good guy. Everybody liked him and was impressed by his attitude.
Do you think he might appear again someday?
I think the door is open for him. He had a real natural bad guy vibe. It's hard to get fans to genuinely hate a WWE character because if they're entertaining enough, people will boo, but do it with a certain amount of respect. And I don't think the fans had any respect for Federline, but apparently the wrestlers backstage did develop some respect for him because of the way he carried himself. Strange, but true.
Are there any plans for you to appear at Wrestlemania on Sunday?
If there are plans, it's a well-kept secret being kept secret from me. I'm not counting on it. I count on very little these days and therefore I am not bound to be as disappointed as I used to get.
Are there any long-term plans for you at this point?
I think I've got a tremendous idea for the day after Wrestlemania that includes a shocking announcement but it's not my show and I don't make the rules, so I can't guarantee that the world will see that idea come to fruition.
The WWE has made films starring John Cena, Kane and Stone Cold Steve Austin. If they offered to let you star in your own movie, what type of film would you want it to be?
Well, they have offered. They say they plan to make me their first WWE television movie star. So Austin and Cena and Kane get the big budgets and I get TV. But I have read the script and I think it's good. I think it will be a fun project, as long as I can stay away from Vince for long periods of time, I think I'll be happy.
Can you talk about the idea of the movie at all?
It involves international espionage and some good action scenes and, like everything I'm involved in, heaping doses of sexuality.
You and Kevin James from The King of Queens were both on the same high school wrestling team together. Who would win in a match between you two? And just for fun, which one of you looks bettering a wrestling singlet?
(Laughs.) We were both spectacularly mediocre wrestlers back then. Both of us just went out as seniors on a whim. I think Kevin went out because as you can see in the picture in my book, he had a much developed physique than I did. I know that that's not what people think of when they see Kevin James on TV, but he was one of the preeminent tough guys at my high school. But we were pretty evenly matched when it came to wrestling. And I think that if we got in the ring together, it would just be a matter of who gassed out first, which is wrestle-speak for losing one's wind.
What do you think you'd be doing for a living if you never got into professional wrestling?
I went to college for radio and television production, so I believe I'd be on one side of the camera or the other. I put together good projects, so maybe I could have been on the creative end of the entertainment world and possibly doing something with WWE.
Tell us something most people don't know about you.
That I'm giving this interview from within the confines of the Mick Foley Christmas room, a year-round Christmas-themed room that I escape to.
Are there any other projects on the horizon you would like to mention?
I guess it's bound to happen to everyone sooner or later, but there is a reality show in the works.
In the book, you mentioned …
That I specifically wouldn't do it. But, I've got a pilot with A&E. I actually called them within the last week and said I've got exciting things happening now, if you don't get those cameras out here in a few weeks, I can't guarantee that my life will be this exciting come summertime.
Will this be like Hulk Hogan's reality show?
It will be a lot different from the Hogan reality show because there's such emphasis on the trials and tribulations of his teenage children. And I think this will be more focused on my own trials and tribulations. And the challenges I face in life are going to be a lot different than those Hulk faces because he's got a lot more money than I do.
How does your wife feel about the idea of a reality show?
Oh, she's terrified. You know, the people at A&E really sold me on what the show could be. I watched some of their shows specifically and I think that in the same way I was really proud of being in Beyond the Mat, I could be proud of a reality show, especially if it allows me to cover some of my interests outside of wrestling and may draw people into supporting some causes that I do.
Any final thoughts before we let you go?
I just think people will be surprised if they open this thing up to find that it's not just about wrestling, that there are chapters that people who have never watched an episode of Raw could probably enjoy, whether it be about the child I sponsor in the Philippines or the terribly burned boy I met in Afghanistan. So I would ask people, including the mainstream media, to not so readily judge this book by its cover.
Interviewed by Joel Murphy, March 2007. The Hardcore Diaries is available in bookstores now. To read our October 2005 interview with Mick Foley, click here.
