When I get married, I'll keep my last name

The whole time my mother was pregnant with me, I was to be named Alexandria Nicole. My parents had planned on either calling me "Nicci" for short or "Alex." Toward the end of her pregnancy, my mother started getting paranoid about the name they chose for me. She actually told me that she asked my dad, "What if we have a stupid kid and she has trouble learning how to spell Alexandria?" No matter how much my dad tried to reason with her that she was being ridiculous, he learned that you just can't reason with a pregnant, emotional woman. It was around that time, mom and dad watched the movie Windwalker and both fell in love with the name "Tashina." They thought that with our last name, it would be a perfect combination.

Growing up, I hated my name. Surrounded by Jessica's and Jennifer's in my classroom, I was envious of girls who seemed to have common names. This was partly because no one ever got my name right. The principal of my school called me "Natasha" for years and every time we had a substitute, the kids in my class all knew when they would get to my name on the roll call list because they would always hesitate before trying to say it. "Uhh...TA-shawna..Tasha..Tashina. Is that right?" The kids would erupt into fits of laughter.

When it wasn't my first name they were laughing at, it was my last name they would use as the butt of jokes. During playground insults, someone was always sure to fire at me, "Yeah well, at least I'm not a SAVAGE!" and all the kids would "ooooh" as if it were the best zing they had ever heard. I'd go home and cry and my mom would be insulted. "I'll have you know that when I met your dad I just knew I had to marry him because I wanted his last name so bad," she'd say, but it'd do little to make me feel better.

My highschool years improved slightly. By then, my name was familiar to most everyone in town so I didn't have to go through the drawn out explanation of how you say my name exactly how it's spelled. Also, my name had been shortened by friends and family, so everyone pretty much called me "Shina." It's hard to screw that one up.

In college, my grade school years were revisited. You'd think being on a campus with hundreds of names more unique than mine, you wouldn't find that many people who still looked at me like I was smoking crack when I told them my name. Only this time it was for different reasons.

"You know that's a black girl's name, don't ya?" The girls in my dorm would tell me.

"It's not any kind of girl's name. It's just mine," I'd say.

"It is a black girl's name!" They'd persist. "Right, Latoya?" They'd call one of the only black girls on our floor for backup.

"Mmmhmm girl." Latoya would say. "My cousin's baby is named Tashina. It's a black girl's name." I just gave up.

In class, it would sometimes be something similar. If I were sitting in the back row while the professors took attendance the first day, they'd scan the seats looking for a "Tashina" almost always passing up my raised hand. I'd have to speak up. "I'm Tashina." I'd say.

"Oh, I'm sorry." they'd say. "I didn't see you with your hand raised. I was looking for someone else. You don't look like a 'Tashina.'"

Was it because I'm not black?

In bars, guys would ask me my name and I'd tell them.
"Katrina?"
"Tashina."
"Christina?"
"Tashina."
"Ta-what?"
"Tashina."
"Can you write it down?" I'd reach for a pen and a napkin.
"Tashina? That's a black girl's name!"

What would be even more amusing is when I'd see these guys out again and they'd attempt to try to remember it. That's one of the things I have hated about my name. Just because it wasn't common, people would take no time to commit it or just the pronunciation to memory. As a rule, I try to NEVER screw anyone's name up and I always try to remember a person's name. I know how it feels to have a guy say, "Hey, I still have your number and I was going to call you, but you'll never believe this. I totally forgot how to say your name." If I had a dime for every time that's happened ...

But you know, I really love my name now. Sometimes it's been a pain in the ass, but that aside, I think it suits me. Who says a white, blonde girl can't be a Tashina? I think I would hate it now, if I had one of the common names I longed for in Kindergarten. I'm really glad that I'm not going by "Alex" these days as well. Also, with working in an office of girls with names like "Courtenay," "Marquita" and "DeAnna," being a "Tashina" isn't so odd.

Plus, a name like Tashina Savage seems destined to be a star's name. In your face Tom Cruise and Marilyn Monroe, with your fake celeb names.

Tashina Savage loves to drench all of her food in hot sauce. She recommends Frank's Red Hot. You can contact her about this column or ask her for her favorite hot sauce recipes at sundaysgirl@gmail.com.