Joffrey Baratheon’s Purple Face Pie
  • 24 oz blackberries
  • zest and juice of 1 lemon
  • ½ cup sugar
  • ¼ cup lemon curd
  • 1 pie crust (recipe here or store-bought)
  1. Wash and sort your berries. In a large bowl, combine them with the lemon zest, lemon juice and sugar. Stir aggressively and mash some of the berries. (I do this with my hands.) Let set for an hour.
  2. Preheat oven to 375°.
  3. Place your dough in a pie dish. You can crimp the edges if you like, but I prefer a more rustic look for a pie of Westeros. Spread the lemon curd on the bottom of the pie crust. Follow with the blackberry mixture. Spread smooth.
  4. Bake for an hour to an hour and 15 minutes. Let cool completely (several hours) before slicing. Serve to the biggest prick in the kingdom. Actually, wait, it’s too good for that. Serve to your friends.
Recipe by HoboTrashcan at