WTF

I don't speak Spanish, but I do know some Italian, so I've decided to sum up this weeks article with "Che genere di merda è questo?" That is the rough Italian equivalent to WTF. For instance, WTF was the Department of Immigration and Naturalization Services (INS) doing when several thousand illegal immigrants took to the streets last week? Or maybe WTF are we still doing trying to act like Russia is an ally? How about, WTF is wrong with the party that two years ago claimed a victory in a "values" campaign, but by and large won it with tainted money? Each of these examples will make more sense if you read down a little further ... just be aware, there may be extreme uses of logic, which apparently doesn't count for much in the world today.

Imagine for a moment that you woke up tomorrow and saw a headline that read, "The U.S. House recently passed a bill to criminalize illegal drug use." You'd be thinking, What the hell? I could have been shooting up smack all these years and couldn't have gotten in trouble for it? Why didn't somebody tell me? Of course, illegal drug use has been a criminal offense for about 80 plus years now. But if you changed drug use to immigration, you'd be talking about a whole other thing altogether.

First off, lets leave the entire racial card playing BS at the door and really get down to the nitty gritty. Illegal immigration is exactly what it says, entering the country illegally. So why do we even need a new law with this? Shouldn't it already be a criminal offense? I've had the luxury of growing up around a lot of Latinos and I've really enjoyed learning about their culture and traditions. But the better part of the Latinos I know are in the military or government employees, a default condition of where I live, so I'm reasonably sure that all their families came here legally.

So when the House did pass such a bill last week and thousands of people took to the streets in protest, I had to ask myself, Where in the hell was the INS? In all fairness, I know that not all the people in the protest were illegal aliens, but it would seem to me that INS personal could've at least been checking green cards or generating a list for later follow up. There is talk that the current laws might be changed and, if they are either tightened or loosened, it wouldn't make much difference. The only change of any significance would be removing the word illegal from in front of immigration.

Bottom-line, the issue isn't about race, it is about legality. If something is illegal, then it is criminal. Don't believe me? Trying buying a pound of cocaine. But that would just be stupid.

Speaking of stupid - why do we keep pretending that Russia is an ally in anything? Recently declassified documents detail how the Bear decided to help out the Iraqis by providing intelligence during the U.S. led invasion. Remember that Putin and Bush have always been buddy-buddy. Even when Putin started rolling back democratic reforms, Bush refused to sway in his loyalty.

In light of recent events, maybe the President can be excused for believing that Dubai, which has been fairly friendly for about the last four years, was totally trustworthy when it came to running our ports. But let this be a lesson to everyone everywhere: Allies are sometimes a matter of temporary convenience, but real allies take decades of work before they can be fully trusted.

Oh yeah, trust (Don't you just love the way I keep the smooth transitions coming?). I'm sure that when the Republican party managed to take the elections last time around based on the "values" vote, the people that voted for them trusted that their candidate was a moral individual. Well, as the campaign finance thing continues to play itself out, it is becoming more and more obvious that this wasn't the case. And don't start screaming that Democrats were involved. Democrats didn't get elected on a "values" ticket, so in the Republicans' case, case it was hypocritical. I can accept the fact that politicians are dirty, money grubbing, sycophants that will do what the money says. What I can't accept is the "Holier than thou" attitude from a bunch of hypocrites.

Talk about a tough week to handle, now that my NCAA Bracket has been completely busted by an 11th seed from my own adopted hometown and St. Patrick's day is already a fading memory. At least Major League Soccer starts next week and I'll have a chance to find solace in something that is simple, elegant and easily attainable ... beer at the RFK Stadium.

Brock Tanner is also an aspiring kept woman ... at least on the fifth Thursday of every month ... for the right amount of money ... inquires can be sent to brocktanner@hobotrashcan.com.