Where are you Christmas?

Growing up, I don't think any other kids loved Christmas quite as much as I did.

I was always the first one in our house that wanted break out the Christmas decorations. I took great joy in taking the ornaments out of their storage boxes and hanging them on the tree. I loved setting up our nativity scene and I would often rearrange it several times before Christmas day. I also really loved looking at all of the Christmas lights along our street. When I was really young, I took great joy in going through the Christmas gift shop they had at my elementary school. I would go through and buy little things like a hacky sack for my brother or a tie for my dad (even though I can count the number of times I've actually seen my dad in a tie on one hand). I'd make some an ornament out of popsicle sticks or a cotton ball snowman to give to my mom.

Even as a kid, I was always someone who enjoyed my sleep. I've never been a person who enjoys waking up early in the morning. But Christmas morning was the one day a year that I couldn't wait to get out of bed. My brother and I would get up in the wee hours of the morning and we'd go into our parent's bedroom and wake them up.

As I've gotten older, my love of Christmas has waned just a bit, but I have always loved this time of year. Even though I hate shopping and despise crowds, I never let the holiday rush bother me. I did my best to ignore the commercialization of the season and instead always chose to focus on the good. As Bill Murray said at the end of Scrooged, "It's the time of the year when we all act a little nicer, we smile a little easier, we ... cheer a little more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year, we are the people that we always hoped we would be."

But this year, I'm having trouble getting into the season. There are only 11 days left until the big day and I am completely lacking in the holiday spirit department. I have no Christmas tree set up, I haven't done any shopping yet and I've even been avoiding listening to Christmas music (something I used to start doing the day after Thanksgiving). I'm finding Christmas to be a burden. I don't know what to get people for presents and I don't really want anything myself (except maybe an Xbox 360, but that is beside the point). The whole holiday just seems like such a hassle and, given the choice, I'd probably just skip it all this year.

Making matters worse, my family members have all made their own plans for Christmas this year. My dad and his wife have decided to take her kids on a cruise. Meanwhile, my brother and his wife, still relative newlyweds, have decided they want to spend Christmas morning alone in their new house. If my mom had made separate plans too, I think I would have developed a complex.

Now, if this was a movie, I'd be visited by three spirits in the night or I'd be turned into Santa Claus or a group of Eastern European terrorist would try to take over my estranged wife's Christmas party and, after a few hijinks and wacky adventures ensued, my heart would suddenly grow three sizes and I would discover the true meaning of Christmas.

But, this isn't a movie. There is no magical Hollywood answer. Much like the Grinch, I couldn't stop Christmas even if I tried, so I was forced to puzzle until my puzzler was sore to find a cure for my holiday blues.

Finally, I got a wonderful, awful idea - I decided to seek out some holiday joy. I convinced my mom that the two of us should head to North Carolina on December 25, so that we can spend Christmas Day at my grandma's house. My Aunt Brenda, who lives in Italy, is going to be there with her two kids - Sheila and Shannon. They are still young and innocent enough to really love Christmas.

With any lucky, the two girls will wake up early in the morning ready to open presents. And, they might even have a hacky sack or cotton ball snowman to give me. But honestly, I'm really not worried about the gifts this year. I'm just hoping that the two of them can help me find a little Christmas spirit.

And, if that fails, I can always just watch that "Ding, Fries are Done" video over and over again. It's the one Christmas gift that just keeps on giving.

Random thought of the week:
Today is my friend Justin's birthday. He has been my best friend since middle school and he has always been there for me, so I wanted to use this space here to wish him a happy birthday. Plus, I'm too lazy to actually go out and buy him a birthday card.

Joel Murphy is the creator of HoboTrashcan, which is probably why he has his own column. He also has some really hot friends. You can contact him at murphyslaw@hobotrashcan.com.