It's only a game

At this point in my life, there aren't a lot of things I would wait hours in line for. I remember in high school, camping out in the parking lot of a mall with my friends one year to get tickets to the HFStival, which was a big annual concert in the Washington, D.C. area. I also have waited outside of the ECW Arena in Philadelphia a few times on the day of a wrestling show to get good seats and to meet some of the wrestlers who were nice enough to come out and greet the crowd. But these days, I prefer to hang around my house in my boxers, sipping cocoa and watching television, instead of sleeping out on the street like a bum (no offense to Hobo Stu).

So when the new Xbox 360 was released last Tuesday, I was nowhere near the long lines of gamers hoping to snag one from their local retailers. This is probably a good thing, since in my home state of Maryland, a brawl broke out at a Wal-Mart after the manager announced that the system would be sold on a first-come, first-served basis even though the people waiting in line had come up with a number system to decide who would get one. Some customers were knocked down and trampled and it took 10 police officers to restore order. Worst of all, the Wal-Mart cancelled the sale.

Of course, if I really wanted to get my hands on an Xbox 360 without actually having to leave the comfort of my home, I could have gone on to eBay and bid on one of the many new Xboxs that quickly popped up on there. Sure, I would have had to pay anywhere from $600 to $2,500 to get one, but I wouldn't have had to set down my cocoa or even put on a pair of pants.

But here's the crazy thing - I didn't want to. Sure, I am the proud owner of the original Xbox and I take great joy in shooting my brother in the face during a spirited game of Halo 2 or picking up Jeff George off of waivers and having him lead the Redskins to a Super Bowl victory in Madden 2006 (sans passing cone). But I had no desire to be one of the first people to own the new system. I decided instead to wait a few months until there are more games out for it and they are easier to find in stores and just pick one up then. It seemed like the practical thing to do.

Which is what worries me. I'm not really a practical guy and I'm definitely not that patient. Besides, growing up we always had the latest video game system in our house. Starting with Intellevision, then moving through the Nintendo family (the original, the Super NES, Nintendo 64, two different version of the Gameboy and I even currently own a Gamecube just for nostalgia's sake). I was an avid reader of Nintendo Power growing up and some of my fondest childhood memories are of my Grandma Murphy taking me out to lunch on my birthday and letting me pick out any video game I wanted in Toys R Us. My brother owned a Sega Dreamcast at one point and currently owns a Playstation 2. I briefly owned a TurboGrafx 16 (mainly just to play Bonk's Adventure) and I've had an Xbox since it first came out.

So what changed? Why wasn't I hanging out in one of the shanty towns with all of the other gamers? At first, I wasn't sure. Then, I got a chance to play Call of Duty 2 on an Xbox 360 this weekend. The guy who owned the system was a bit younger than me and as I sat there repeatedly getting "fragged" (as the kids say) by him, it hit me - I'm getting old.

The video game world is slowly passing me by. I can't run out and get a new gaming system because I need to use my money on things like gasoline, rent and food. I don't want to wait in line because I'd rather sleep in my comfortable bed than outside on the sidewalk. Working on this site and taking care of all my other commitments, I don't have as much time to devote to playing video games as I used to. That's why that young punk, who doesn't have any idea what it's like to guide Frogger safely across a busy intersection or even what it takes to beat down Mr. Sandman in Mike Tyson's Punch-Out, totally "pwned" my ass this weekend. It's his time now.

As Danny Glover once said, "I'm getting too old for this shit."

Of course, when Halo 3 comes out, all bets are off. I just hope I don't have to wait in line too long to get a copy.

Random thought of the week:
You never really know who is going to break down and cry at a wedding. Sometimes the people you think will lose it end up being as steady as a rock and the ones you least expect end up bawling like a little girl.

Joel Murphy is the creator of HoboTrashcan, which is probably why he has his own column. He also has some really hot friends. You can contact him at: murphyslaw@hobotrashcan.com